I can't fight it.
I can deprive myself of so many vices.
But it doesn't get rid of the paramount ardor.
The butterfly dragon, that is crawling out of my skin.
Ignore.
Avoid.
Try to distract myself.
From this feeling, this desire, this burn, that keeps me awake.
Convincing myself that I have control.
Convincing myself that I don't need this.
Convincing myself that other things can light this fire in my being.
And suddenly, I inhale that divine scent.
Essence, my body craves.
A sensation that makes my thoughts flutter.
A lagniappe to my soul.
Electric bolts that ravel in the hall ways of my existence.
The sempiternal flame has ignited once again.
My body is imbued with his venom.
A susurrous ghost has pierced my conscious.
And I'm back to square one, so much for self control.
